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The Overplayed Hand

Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. - 1 Peter 5:8

I was sitting in a group of friends. We are laughing and talking. Then my friends start talking about past memories, laughing and talking without me. I hear phrases like…
“Remember that day when we were at my house?...at lunch that one time...at that party...when our kids were playing…”
And the insecurity hits me. The fear. The feeling of not belonging. I hadn’t been invited to those things.
And the lies start…
You don’t really belong to their group. You aren’t included.

Then the lie gets bigger…
You aren’t enough to be included.

And bigger yet…
You don’t belong now, and you won’t ever belong anywhere. Ever.

Have you ever had this happen to you?

I was having lunch with my friend and mentor (Suze Fair) and she said something that has stuck with me:

Satan always overplays his hand. He takes a thought we are having and adds his lie to make it so outrageous...but still enough truth that we buy it.”

He is bluffing. He has no power over you if you are a child of God. No power.

A few more examples:

My two youngest children have severe food allergies that are very serious and can quickly become life-threatening. When I leave them anywhere (preschool, Sunday school, with a sitter), I struggle with fear…
My biggest fear/thought as I leave them:
What if they have a reaction when I’m not with them? Will anyone know what to do?
Satan’s overplayed lie:
No one is competent enough to handle their food allergies. You’re going to get a call today that your child is dead.

As I’m eating lunch with my size four friend…
My thought:
It would so great to be a size four.
Satan’s overplayed lie:
Do you really believe you could ever look like her? Impossible. You aren’t capable of looking like that.

While looking at some pictures, my husband innocently mentions a girl in one of the pictures he does business with…
My thought:
She’s really pretty.
Satan’s overplayed lie:
She’s gorgeous. Do you really think you’re going to keep your husband’s attention with her around? Not in a million years.

I have talked to so many women who struggle with these thoughts. They hesitate to share them (and so do I) because it feels really vulnerable to admit.

But I believe admitting our struggle and pinpointing the lies behind them is the first step in defeating our enemy and his shame game. It’s a really old game; but can be really effective for him if we let it.

The only “Ammunition” that will work against our enemy is the “Bullet” of God’s Word.

Nothing else has the power to defeat him.

Beth Moore talked about this and said that if we don’t use God’s Word against our enemy in these situations, it would be like trying to blow a deadly snake’s head off with a gun that’s not even loaded. It just wouldn’t work and you would look ridiculous, right?

*We have to to have our silver bullets. And more importantly, we have to have our guns loaded! Trying to defeat him with anything else would be ridiculous and ineffective.

So, here’s the battle plan…

  1. Pinpoint the lie and state your true fear.

  2. Bring it to the Lord and confess your fear and ask for forgiveness and wisdom. Confess it to the involved person if it is appropriate. This is also called bringing it out into the Light. Something exposed cannot hold the same power over you.

  3. Find a Scripture that speaks to the lie (and blows it up with Truth) you are struggling with. Write it down on a notecard and memorize it. Carry the card with you until you have it written on your heart.

  4. Learn to recognize the lie and when it comes, you speak that Scripture out loud (as many times as you need), praying as you speak it, and tell the enemy to take a hike. Remember the authority you carry with you as a child of God.

  5. Smile and praise the Lord for his powerful Word as the enemy has to flee from you as you resist him (James 4:7).



Here are my four examples I shared and my plan to find victory:

  1. The Friend Insecurity Example:
    True Fear: I don’t belong anywhere.
    My “Ammunition:”

    For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will. - Ephesians 1:4-5

    And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. - Ephesians 1:13

    Truth: I am chosen, loved, adopted, and included in God’s family forever. I always have a place with Him. I belong to God.


  2. The Food Allergy Example:
    True Fear: My children will die from food allergies when I”m not with them.
    My “Ammo:”

    When I am afraid, I will trust in you. - Psalm 56:3

    They will have no fear of bad news; their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the Lord. Their hearts are secure, they will have no fear; in the end they will look in triumph on their foes. - Psalm 112:7-8

    Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me.” - Mt. 28:18

    Truth: I am not in control. Jesus is and that is a very good thing. My security (and identity) doesn’t come from anything external ever; my security comes from God. No matter what happens, we win in the end. Peace comes to those who bow to His beautiful authority and sovereignty.


  3. Size Four Friend Example:
    True Fear: I’m not enough the way I am.
    My “Ammo:”

    It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. - Galatians 5:1

    “He trusts in the Lord,” they say, “let the Lord rescue him. Let him deliver him, since he delights in him.” - Psalm 22:8

 

Truth: I am a Princess and I am delighted in, no matter if I’m a size four or twenty-four. I am a Daughter of the King of Kings. I am beautiful and I am royalty, because of Jesus Christ.

      4. Husband Example:
          True Fear: My husband will love someone else and I’ll be alone
          (basically, I’m afraid God wouldn’t be enough).
          My “Ammo:”

          You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance. Many are the woes of the wicked, but the Lord’s unfailing love surrounds the one who trusts in him. - Psalm 32:7,10

          “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” - Hebrews 13:8

          And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him head over everything for the church, which is his body; the fullness of him who fills everything in every way. - Ephesians 1:22-23

          Truth: God’s love is unfailing and unchanging. I will never be alone and He is always enough.

Ladies, let’s get our Ammo and start blowing our enemy, and his lies, back to hell where they belong.

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If you are an imperfect wife, mom, daughter, or friend, struggling to stay focused on God in the craziness and find joy in the heartache, then we have something in common. I am a recovering perfectionist and daughter of the King, slowly learning to fully trust the One who sees me just as I am, and is already pleased. I’m so glad you are here.

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